Maybe I should get better at this....

Ok... so I haven't written in a while... and I need to catch up with my 365-picture journal.... maybe I should be working on that. In any case, a lot has happened in the last... 5 months. It's crazy how time flies and life changes. I'm not a teenager any more (holy cow ridiculous!) and I'm definitely facing some things that I never would've imagined. In that last 5 months I have managed to:

• Get my heartbroken: I'm very good at this because I have managed to do this twice. For some reason I only date jerks (if you think that you're a nice guy... stay away!). Oh well, I have learned a lot of things I would've been fine with out, but I'm a better person for it. Things like what to do when you've watched every chick flick you own, how to eat too much ice cream, what happens when you choose to not leave your room for 5 days in a row.
• Survive a mental breakdown: This isn't as easy as it sounds. Despite having dealt with moving around my entire life, for some reason the last two years has been a little ridiculous. Well, throw in a little extra stress, a major lack of sleep, and too much homework, and things just start to fall apart.
• First car accident: It wasn't that bad... some one tried to merge into me on I-40... well, they didn't just try, they DID. So, now I have a lovely little dent in my pretty little car. It is quite the tragedy.
• Bronchitis: I had bronchitis for a month straight... yeah.... it was awful. Thankfully my lungs are only occupied by air and tissue again (less mucus...). You don't realize how enjoyable breathing is, until it's a very hard thing to do.
• Two months physical therapy: Yeah... oh well. Apparently I have "snapping hip syndrome" and "IT Band Friction Syndrome" (ask google...). Let's just leave it at "rather painful" and thank the physical therapy for quite a bit of exercise.
  
• Nanny: She's in the hospital. She's doing a lot better right now, but she's still in a lot of pain. Keep her in yours prayers bitte!
• Transfer: I applied to BYU way back when I was beginning my mental break down. It was done in a "I hope this goes through quickly so that I can leave Tennessee ASAP" but it didn't actually work out like that. So instead I found out over Spring break that I had been accepted... right after i had decided I was probably not going to get in. So, I did get in, and now I am going. Yeah... me... moving to UTAH!!!! It should be interesting.
  

So... that's quite the list. BUT it's okay. Why? Because I know that everything I've been going through has made me a better, stronger person. I have lost some amazing friends because I was too stressed and busy worrying about things I didn't have control over. I lost friends that I really cared about, and who really cared about me. But it's okay, because it's over, and I'm back on the straight and narrow... headed to Utah.

It has been...six monthes!

Goodness, it's a good thing no one reads this journal, because I haven't written in here in forever. Mostly I am just trying to get through college right now.

The University has started referring people to Facebook for more information on events, while my roommate is driving me crazy. I have been assigned to a new room for next year, sans any roommates. So that will be nice. Paul is a missionary in Albania now! Keven is in New York, Jer is in South Africa and David is in Rio de Janiero! Crazy how fast time flies and people just.... grow up!

I feel crushed.

So, here's the deal, me and my two "best friends" were going to get an apartment together. We'll call them Kate and Sarah (sorry if that is some one's name on my flist and I didn't realize it... nothing personal), well. Kate and I have been best friends the whole year, we've been really close, and yeah, I've never connected with some one like I did with her. Sarah moved here about a month ago, and we clicked really well. She graduated last semester, and she's 21, Kate is my age.

Well, I found us a two bed room apartment for the three of us, and Kate and I were going to share a room. Well, I had everything organized, I got my parents to go along with it, even though the whole time they were kind of skeptical, telling me to be really careful, but everything seemed like it was fine. Well, on Saturday (un-known to me) Sarah went to Kate with a proposition that "Jessica doesn't NEED and apartment, she just wants it." and pretty much told Kate (who by the way, just got kicked out of her house for getting baptized, so is... sehr poor with few options) the optimatum "like with me(Sarah), and we can kick Jessica out, or find some where else to live", and Kate definitely doesn't have too many options, and had no where to stay for the summer, so she decided to stay with it. Well, they told me last night, Sarah using the excuse of "I'm just too stressed and I need my space" and yeah... i was "voted off the island"... even though it was my island.

Well, today I talked to my mom, and she said "If the paying for the summer is a problem, talk to Kate and tell her we'de be willing to pay half for the summer, and then just she and I could room together. Well, she felt bad about ditching Sarah... meanwhile, I had until 5 pm today to cancel my housing contract with the university, so pretty much she just let time run out so she didn't have to make a decision. Well, she also chose the girl she's known for a few weeks over the girl she's known the whole year.

I hope they're happy. I will be living in a single room with a complete stranger for an entire year. I don't really know what to do. I don't want to be friends with them any more, but we all have the same friends, and there is no was to avoid them unless I stop going to church.

Where is my brain?

So I titled the last entry "Icee", and I didn't even touch on that...

So yesterday I saw a girl drinking an Icee, and so i was really really craving one. Well, I walked out to my car to go to Wal*mart to get tape and another tub for my stuff, cause I'm packing up to go home. Well, on the way to the car I saw the beautiful Elyse, and stole her to go to wally-world with me. Well, on the way back we stopped at a gas station, with no luck, and so we went back to campus and went to the Pilot, and got 2 large icees for 99 cents each. :D BUT, there was no cherry... so I had to get a coke flavored one... which was not nearly as satisfying. :(

This morning at 10 ish I got up, packed a little bit more, and then called my mom, talked with her for a long time about the apartment, and then I ate lunch with Elyse... turned in her English paper for her... then called my mom and talked some more. Now I am waiting for her to check her e-mail and call me back. That is all.

ICEES!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I am trying to pack up my dorm room, and study for exams, and be cool and fun and responsible all at the same time.... not working out so well.

I got to chat with an old friend of mine. We went to middle school together, and he's on my MSN list, but I am hardly ever on there, so when he signed on, I said hello.

I also wanted to share pictures of the new apartment that I will be moving into next fall.

New Apartment

hell-o

I went apartment hunting today.

Ohmygoodnessshootmenowplease.

That's all I have to say.

A New Day Has Come

BIOLOGY 101 029 LEC 09:40A-10:55A TR
BIOLOGY LAB 03:35P-05:30P W
ECONOMICS 201 023 LEC 11:10A-12:25P TR
ECONOMICS LAB 09:05A-09:55A M
ED INTER 335 001 LEC 03:40P-04:55P TR
EDUC PSYCH 210 004 LEC 05:05P-06:20P TR
MUSC ENSBL 380 001 GMI 12:20P-02:15P MW
POLIT SCI 102 005 LEC 02:10P-03:25P TR
RELIGION 398 001 LEC 06:30P-08:00P W

Here are my classes for next semester. Biology, Intro to Econ, ASL 3, Educational Psychology, Concert Choir, and Intro to Political Science.

18 Hours total. I declared a teaching minor, and now I just need to find a major. It doesn't really matter what I major in, as long as it's in Arts and Sciences. ASL is not in arts and sciences, so I can't do that. I will probably end up doing psychology or something like that. I dunno.

My schedule is really nice though. Monday is Econ lab in the morning, choir at noon, tuesdays and thursday I have class from 9:40 until 6:20, the bulk of it all. And then wednesday I have choir at noon and biology lab from 4- 5:30 and religion from 6:30 to 8. WOOT!!!

What is America coming to...

so earlier today Brandan told me there was a shooting at v-tech. I hadn't heard much about it, I don't watch the news, but I left for choir at "1 dead", left choir at "22 dead" and got back to my dorm room, turned the tv on and the death toll was listed as "31 dead". Brandan's ok... Chrissy... in case you haven't talked to him.

Go to bed! That's what I would do...

Ummm... hello... it is two in the morning (I'm writing a paper) and my suite mate has just decided it's a good time to get in the shower.... what is wrong with this picture? I hate it when she does this, because it means I have to listen to her sing for the next 30 minutes. GAH!

Ummm... in other news.... I hate my english class and all of the obsessive BORING, useless work we've done this semester. That is all.

The young are crazy.

So, for a while now I've been kind of falling in love with this guy, slowly but surely. So... I had been talking with a friend, and had come up with ya know, present the hypothetical scenario "I (me... Jessica), really like this guy... bob... but bob like's a mutual friend of ours... let's call her sue.... little does bob know, sue likes joe. What should I do? Should I tell Bob that I'm falling for him, or just leave it be and ignore it?" And Jon being... Jon... said "honesty is the best policy". So, we talked a little bit more about the situation, and I said that I haven't said anything because I've been hurt badly before, and I don't want it to happen again. Any ways, (this all happened while I was driving him home), when he got out of the car, I half way wanted to just leave it at the hypothetical situation and let him ponder a little bit, but I couldn't, so I said "Jon... you're bob." And there ya go. I told a guy that I like him... that I'm pretty much crazy about him. He was nice enough to let me know that he thought he was really like "sue", but after spending some time with her, realized that he would rather just be friends, and that we will go on a date or 5 (he makes me laugh), and see how things go. I then had to let him know that I was just putting it out there, and he could think on it for a while before saying anything... because i think he felt like I was expecting an answer, but eh.

any who... that's my journal post of the month.

Save me fromt he dark abyss of dark abyssness!

So.. it's been a while...

I keep saying this over and over again, but i understand why my friends that graduated before me disappeared for like a year before they started being socialable. I am DIEING! I have so much school work and church and... parties... lol that I don't have enough time to sit around on my computer any more. It's Thursday, but sadly I was ready for the week to be over on Monday, and Wednesday felt like it should be Friday, and everything was just mixed up, and the week is almost over and I feel like I've missed most of it! Go figure.

Last weekend I went to Nashville with some friends to go to the temple and it was amazing. I had done a session and was waiting for some of my friends. The weather was beautiful, the air was delicious, and everything was perfect. I just did a bit of reading and wrote in my actual journal (which is why this journal is suffering, because I have been writing in my real journal, which only has about 15 pages left in it.). Then on Monday I had to write two papers, and I had a math test to study for. It was sort of pretty much terrible because I didn't get back till 9:30, and I didn't get anything done Sunday because I had church, and then a fireside.

I'm not a slacker, it's important to realize that, but I've kind of been slacking a little bit, and I need to pick things up. I've started doing homework when it's assigned, instead of waiting till the night before (which is how I got through my first semester), and I've also decided after a few months of confusion and doubts that I like my religion, and I still believe what I previously said I believed, just in a little bit different way. I feel like a little bit of a hypocrite now, but I'm working on being a better person, and that's all that matters I guess.

I've got to run off to my philosophy class, but I'm going to try and update more then once a month.

Bless you?

When my suite-mate sneezes, it sounds like she's screaming, and it scares the crap out of me!

I won't grow up... I don't wanna go to school...

I feel like I'm being forced to grow up, and it is too much for me. some days i just want to crawl back in bed and hide from the sun, pretend like it never came out, and that it is night. Today I found out that a dear friend of mine tested positive for HIV. I never dreamed that some one so close to me could be affected by this, and it makes me worry that more of my friends are in the same boat, but not willing to talk about it. Along with that, I also found at that a friend from my graduating class has cancer and is going through chemo.

These people are both the same age as me, and they are being faced with the sudden reality that we are not as invincible as previously believed. No one should have to deal with this at 18. Or 19 or 20 or ever. Why do horrible things like this exist.

Mitchel the Second is born.

So I got my birthday present from Nanny and I am loving this woman more and more every day. lol. She got me an iPod...and it's beautiful!

Sick as a Panda

I haven't been this sick in a while. Last night was the worst night ever. I went to bed at like 10, but woke up every hour or so because i was coughing. I had taken some Mucinex DM, but it just isn't doing the job for me... so at 4 AM I got up, took some dayquil, and then went back to bed. I'm thinking about investing in some niquil just to make my life easier.

Give me your digits...

So... I find this slightly amusing...

where did my life go?

Life is freaking crazy. Today's agenda:

-Write English paper rough draft due monday...4-5 pages
-Write ASL review of activities: 6 page minimum
-Do math homework...for 5 sections in the book... that's like a million and TWO problems.

plus I could probably do some reading for my psychology class, watch my 30 minute video for ASL, and catch up on the reading for my philosophy class... but that would all be horribly ambitious. Oh well.

GET UP!

I slept through my alarm this morning and missed the first hour and a half of church. I can't get there fast enough for it to be worth it.

I really need to fix this whole alarm problem. I seem to not wake up to my alarms, or I turn them off with out waking up. GAH!

un-un-date-able.

So... I went on my first date tonight... with this guy. His name is Jonathan. It was great.

insert cuss words here ________________

I feel like such a loser. I am on the edge of tears, but I can't cry.