Growing up...

I'm trying to get a hold on my life.

I've gained 30 pounds since getting married.

We haven't saved up the kind of money we were hoping to.

We had no food storage.

That's not the kind of life I want to continue with. So I've implemented a few changes. Like, we're counting calories now.

I've lost six pounds in a week, just by cutting out snacking and eating better. Incredible really. I know I can't always expect these kinds of results, but I think it's a tribute to just how unhealthy our life style had been, just one week ago.

We've started budgeting. See below for the awesome tool we're using.

We're started on the food storage. It's not huge, but we're working on it.

I want to tell you about the website we're using to budget though. I had spent a few hours chronicalling all of our spending in Excel (my least favorite program in the world) when I made a facebook plea for suggestions. After multiple "try using excel" suggestions, my Mama suggested I look at Mint.com and holy cow, I wish she had said it 4 hours earlier. Here is a little tour of Mint.com - just in case you too are looking for an easy to use, free, budgeting program. I realize the pictures are a bit small, so you can also check them out at flickr.com/areedwedding for a closer look at the details.

After creating an on Mint.com, you can add your bank accounts. I know this seems a little sketchy, but the connection between Mint.com and your bank is Read Only. They can collect the information, but they (and you) can't move money or do any other kind of transactions.

This is super useful for us, as we share accounts, but we have accounts at two different banks. They pull all of the transaction from both banks, and put them in one place. As you can see in the picture below, it's completely customizable - if something is listed incorrectly, you can change it and label it with one of the pre-made labels, or you can add your own. I changed Wal*Mart to mean groceries, since that is where we do our grocery shopping.

It also lets you split a purchase, so if you buy groceries, and a new pair of jeans on the same trip, you can set $30 for the groceries and $20 for the jeans, or what ever you spent.

Once all of your transactions have been listed, they create your current budget based on your past purchases. This was pretty shocking for us, since we had been spending far too much money on eating out. If the "pre-set" budget isn't what you want to spend, then you can change it, or if they don't have something you want to include in your budget, then you can add it. It also shows your spending compared to the US.

Another feature is it lets you decide if you want the budget to roll over. I said yes on the entertainment/eating out budgets, but no on the groceries, rent, etc - because those are pretty set in stone.

After you set up your budget, you can see it. I love the visual aspects of this website

As you can see, our ridiculous Electric bill hasn't hit our account yet, so but our rent, phone, and internet bills have. It tell you how much of your budgets money is left. If you go over - the bar turns red.

If you stick to the budget, then on the right it tells you how much money you will (potentially) have left over, and you can see how much it adds up over the next 3, 6, 9 or 12 months!

It also gives you pretty pie-charts! These can be organized by category, merchant, and over time. If you click on one piece of the pie chart, it gives you another breakdown of that specific category.

On the left it shows the potential to add other types of accounts, like managing your student loans, investments, and property. On the bar graph is also shows you where you are in the month, so for items like groceries or entertainment you can see how much money you have left compared to how much of the month is left.

You can also set up alerts, to let you know when you're reaching your Credit Card limits, or when you (or some one who has stolen your card) makes a huge purchase, or when bills are due.

Overall I am very pleased with this website. It also offer investment opportunities, and "ways to save" - or offers for credit cards/accounts based on your spending habits.

And the last thing I need to say is:

Thanks Mom!

Dieting.

This may be the most personal blog I've ever written. So with that in mind, tread lightly because this is a sensitive topic.

I weigh too much. How much? I'm not comfortable putting a number on the internet. Let's just say my BMI puts me into the "Obese" category, and I'm determined to change that.

With small steps.

One of my goals before I turn 23 is to lose 20 pounds. To be honest... I had considered putting ten. That would've been easy - but I'm hoping to go above and beyond 20. My goal is actually to lose 100 pounds. If I lost 100 pounds I would be considered a "healthy weight."

How am I going to do this? Here are a few things B-man and I are using:

1. We're walking the dogs. Every morning. Further and further. We started out with a 30 minute walk, but eventually we'll get up to jogging. I really need to work on building up strength in my hip - which keeps my from wanting to go jogging for fear of weeks of pain.
   


2. I bought a book. A cook book. A diet book. I don't know. It's by Taste of Home magazine, and it's called the "Comfort food cookbook diet." Here is why this works for me:
   


It all looks delicious!
It does not depend on fish or other seafood to get the low calorie count.
It does not depend on bell peppers for the flavor. This is a big one as bell peppers give me the worst heart burn ever. EVER!
It's easy.

And lastly? It has 6 weeks of meals already planned out for you. You just have to buy the ingredients and make it. And these recipes aren't just some thing a chef came up with, but tried and true recipes from people who have had success with this diet.


3. We're using the above methods in combination with The Hacker's diet online. It's just an easy place to keep track of your progress and goals, and it gives you a good idea of how many calories to cut out in order to lose "x amount" of weight a week.
   
   
4. That's the fourth thing. We're calorie counting. It sounds scary, and crazy. The only thing that makes it easier is that every recipe in this cook book is already counted up!
   
So... any "diet cookbook" that includes donught



And pizza pockets...



Is okay in my book!

I get the impression that people think I'm a confident, capable young woman. In most cases, that's true. But really - I hate the way I look. I hate the way my clothes feel. I hate the number on my pants. I hate the way my heart races when I walk up a hill, or the way my hip hurts when I'm just sitting down. I look in the mirror and see some one who is fat, and ugly, and I am going to change it.

Weight has always been emphasized in my family. Diets and work out plans and relatives telling me "You'll never find a husband if you weigh that much." Ridiculous. I'm not doing this for them, I'm doing it for myself. Because I want to like myself.

The End.

Think positive thoughts.

So, I had a meeting this morning, and left rather disgruntled. I felt the meeting was less productive than it should've been, and I left feeling a little deflated.

BUT... thankfully my day got better. I went over to TSD to do some more volunteering. I'm helping take language samples and it is so much fun. I really love working with these kids. Every time I go I feel like I picked the wrong major! And then I think "Oh no, I have to go back to school!" Because I really think that teaching is what I want to do.

Now what? I don't know. Maybe I'll go back to school and get a degree in general education. Bah! This is where my stress levels increase and I start to think "Oh now I can't do anything?!"

Almost done. Almost done.

Sorry... I don't have any more coherent sentences.

Later: our new "diet" and "work-out" schedule. Woot!

Bullying...

I'm in physical pain right now, because I can't express how deeply this recent event hurts me though. I don't really want to go into detail, but the short of it is, a 16 year old girl named Phoebe Prince committed suicide because of the harassment she received at school.

Teacher knew.

Parents knew.

Other kids knew.

No one did anything. No one. How is that possible? How do ADULTS sit by and watch a child be picked on for so long.

Today in my diverse learners class this event was brought up, showing the importance of teaching about diversity, and the importance of standing up for people who can't stand up for themselves. I know this seems ridiculous, but I feel guilty because I wasn't there for this little girl. I'm a few thousand miles away, but if I had been there, she wouldn't be dead. This wouldn't have happened.

I'm kind of just putting undo stress on my self, but I know what it's like to be a new kid in a strange country (she was from Ireland).

Oddly enough - it was South Hadley HS, Mass. which is the same town my husband's extended

family lives in. Small world.

So tell me - what do you do? I am not really an outspoken person. People can have their opinions, but when it comes to respecting other human beings, and especially with kids, we - the teachers, parents, role models - are the only example. If we don't say "no" then by default, we are saying "yes."

If you don't stand for something, you will fall for anything.

Crying.

I hate sad posts.

I hate depressing posts.

I tend to stop blogging when things aren't happy because I don't really want to dwell on them.

But today is a special case (because it has a (semi) happy ending).

I woke up this morning. Then I went to class. Debate class. It's a part of my western civilization class. It's kind of silly, but in general it's not too bad. We discuss things like "Which had a bigger economic impact, AIDS or the Plague." Yeah. Duh. We sit in these groups and come up with questions for other groups. Here's where it goes sour.

I suggested a question. Some one else said something, and the next thing I know:

I'm crying. Yes. I'm sitting a group with three 20 year old guys, and I'm crying. Why am I crying? Because... I don't know. I can't even explain why I'm crying. Should I say "One day you'll understand." or "Wait till you get married."? Nope, you probably won't understand then either. I spend so much of Sunday crying that social interaction is causing me just enough stress to make me cry. Oh dear.

So, I did manage to get out the words "Failed a few midterms" and "really it's nothing" before one of the afore mentioned 20 something year olds offered me a handkerchief.

What?

Yeah, that zip sound that happens in movies. That happens in my life. It was sweet, but I had to politely decline. Really, he had probably used it to wipe his nose on... or maybe he carries it around to offer to crying married women. Who knows?! I did manage to make it through the rest of my 50 minute class without crying. Yes!

The people, they look like ants, marching

back and forth, where are they going?

Where have they been?

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. I finished my project for my class that I had failed the test in. Then spent a good while trying to convince myself that I should go. Cause, ya know, skipping doesn't usually help your grade.

So, I went to class. And I got my test back. It was one page long. I cried. I hyperventilated. I already know what grade I'd gotten. Why was I crying again? I excused myself to the bathroom. Then I sat down. I took slow, deep breaths.

I wasn't going to be able to talk her. Just thinking about this was making me upset. So, I wrote it down. I went through each of her response, and wrote down why I thought that my response was correct. English is such an ambiguous language. Lame. I think I cried during this part too. I guess confrontation causes me stress.

In class we talked about independent learning.

She just gave us a bunch of bottles of stuff and some almonds.

Yeah... this is what we came up with!

It all worked out in the end. I ended up explaining two of them, which she had read differently than I had intended, and she said I could do the other questions again for half credit. So, instead of getting an 8/15, I now have a 13/15. We also had a good chat about the value of grades, and that she knows I work hard, and that as long as I keep participating and turning in my homework, there's no way I will get below an A. Awesome. Could you have told me that on Saturday, when you sent out the "test grades." Yup, muchly appreciated. Then I wouldn't have eaten all of this:

Ok... I didn't actually eat all of that today. And it had nothing to do with Language Development, or classes. Well, it did have to do with classes, but in a round-a-bout kind of way.

I was going to watch a movie. I needed to watch the movie so I could pick an element of Judaism to write about, that was present in the movie. I didn't see any religion. I missed it. I watched the whole thing. We talked about it. Yeah... he's Jewish... but... umm... not so much? I can't write about it. Even I can't BS two pages about nothing! So, thankfully there is another option and I will write about the other movie.

Life is Beautiful. That's the name of the movie. It came out in 1998. It is probably one of the sweetest, most sad movies I have ever seen in my entire life. I ate ice cream. I cuddled the dog. I hid my eyes. I plugged my ears. Then I cried. The main character, a Jewish Italian during the holocaust, is in the camp with his son, whom he hides from the Germans to keep alive. He makes it into this big game of points and hide and go seek, and then....

I can't talk about movies. Go look it up if you want to know. Some people like to know what's happening, and other don't. I must know. Everything. I hate surprises. Yuck.

Any way, I cried. I started to tear up, and B-man looked at me. I cried.

"Don't laugh at me?!"

"I'm trying not to cry too!"

Yup, those were his exact words. So it's not that I'm a crazy-crying lady, oh thank goodness.

My two favorite...men?

And I guess that is where I must end. I am so thankful to the people who have supported me through this miniature meltdown of mine. I don't know what came over me, but it was awful. I should be returning to full health soon, but beware, because I still might cry.

My poor husband. It's not even "that time" and I'm acting like a lunatic!

Self esteem boosts rock!

So I have been posting vlogs of me signing recently, and the response has been wonderful. It really makes me feel good to know that people enjoy watching them, as I was worried people would be like "I don't want to take 3 minutes to 'read' you blog!"

Thank you.

The reason I started this blog (again) was because I needed to do something for myself. I was getting so stressed out about school and all of the craziness that was my life, and I just needed a creative outlet, a place to write down to awesome, and lame things in my life.

Now, for some picture evidence of that new TV!

Sizing up the competition!

Our old TV was not small, but it was time. Oh, if you know any one looking to buy a TV... let me know. It comes with the stand and... ummm... you can have the sound system too if you want!

I always think it's going to be exciting opening new things, then I remember I'm doing it with B-man. It's not that he's not exciting... but... he doesn't show any kind of excitement. So I'm jumping around behind the camera doing a happy dance, and he's like "are you really going to take pictures of this???" So umm... this was the only picture I took of the set-up.

I snuck back in there today while he wasn't looking and took a "finale" picture. Now, it's not really final because now we need to find a place to put all of the dishes and things we were storing in that entertainment center! lol. Know any one selling a hutch? haha.

All in all, we're just kind of growing up. We are so thankful to the people who donated to the newlywed cause, but one by one we are growing up, and buying new thing. Let me compare lists for you though:

My List

1. Comfy couch

Yeah... I know, there's really only one thing on my list. But that's because I am pretty satisfied. Here's another list though:

B-man's list

1. Component cables for the Wii
2. upgrade our cable to HD
3. Blueray player
4. Comfy couch.

Now, he hasn't explicitly said he wants a comfy couch, but I think it should be on his list.

Maybe we'll return the TV.... and get a couch instead! lol.

ETA: I wanted to send a special thanks out to Kelsey, who respond to my ASL video, with her own video! AWESOME! I "wrote" back! Ok... I think four hyper-links is enough for one sentence!

Two of my favorite things:

1. House. I love Me some Dr. House. Yes. I said love.
2. Blogging. I like talking about my attempts at cooking, crafting, sleeping, dog...owning (not sure how to make that one a verb!).

So Sissela Bok over at My Life*: Lady, asked, are there any "original bloggers." And you know, I would have to say yes. This is definitely not "self-promotion." Because before she asked this questions, I was thinking the same thing! I was trying to think about what makes me different from most people, and I guess it could be applied to bloggers as well. These things influence who I am, and in turn that influences what I blog about. I'm still working on this list, but for now it's kind of my own little pep-talk:

• I talk to myself. I talk to myself in my blog. My husband read something in my blog once and said... "Gosh, you really sound like this!" Which to me is fantastic. Yeah, I sound like an idiot! Lol. But honest to goodness, this blog is just a snap shot of the things I love about my life.
• I'm a jack of all trades. It is very unlikely that you could come up with a craft or activity that I haven't done. I love painting, sewing, writing, playing piano, singing, scrapbooking, and a myriad of other things.
• American Sign Language. I don't know how many people know ASL, but I not only know it, I use it every day as part of my passion. I love working with deaf children. It is such a special feeling when you finally see the understanding hit their tiny little brains. (More on this later. I could talk about Deaf kids, and ASL forever... and ever... and ever...)
• I love my dogs. That might not seem special, but the important thing here is that I love MY dogs. They are so precious to me. And their funny. I would keep them around just for that.
• I met my husband in high school, in Germany, when he used to tutor me in math (my least favorite subject ever!). He is one of two people who has seen me cry over math, meaning... I either had to marry him, or kill him - and I'm a gentle hearted person. lol. But seriously, B-man and I have been friends for so long, our relationship is something... a little different from your average romance. Not every one can so quaintly discuss their philosophical views on poop. But we can.
• I'm not a mom... or a foodie.... or a talented photographer. I dabble in most of these things, like... I talk about middle schoolers a lot... or I take pictures of the food I'm making. But I doubt any one would want to try my recipes, or pay for my pictures. Just not my thing.

So... that's the list for the time being. Now, tell me: what makes you unique?!

PS: I also have some pink hair... I guess that's "Special!"

Some times...

There are times when I feel like every conversation we've ever had just goes right out the passenger window.

Then I say things that I don't really mean, and he says things he doesn't mean either. It's a mess.

But the goal of the conversation was to be productive, and now nothing is being said because no one can say anything nice.

Some times I just can't tell him what's on my mind. It's not a secret, I just don't have the words.

____________________________________________________

On Thursday B-man and I went to Barley's Taproom and Pizzeria. It was good. Good food, and good company. I went as an extra credit oppertunity for one of my classes, but I probably would've gone any ways. It was a good chance to meet some new people and just enjoy a night out with friends. I know it is not as interesting for Bran-man because he doesn't sign, but maybe he'll be motivated to learn a little bit? Maybe?

Then after the dinner/hanging out we went on a scavenger hunt to find this:

That big jar on the right. Ignore my awesome pot-hanging system , and Mr. Moose in the fish bowl. That big jar on the right is the beginning to my awesome kitchen. Yeah, the one I don't have right now, but one day, in the future, will be mine. The one that will be full of windows, and the upper cabinents will be glass so people can see my fun eclectic dishes (that I have not collected yet), and the big island where the whole family can sit to make cookies at Christmas time. Yeah... I'm getting there. One step down, a million more to go.

Birthday Bash, and philosophical thinking on poop.

Some times, when I lose things, I think "If I were Jessica on a good day, where would I logically keep things so that I will remember..." this is how I found my camera, and the batteries today. It only took me 30 minutes. Lies... I've been looking for the batteries for 3 days now. They were in my desk drawers. Duh.

This is going to be a compilation of things. Since I refrained from a real post yesterday, I have plenty to post! Like... Birthday presents! Before I could blog I had to finish writing my 10 page paper about women's equality in Ancient Athens.

What doesn't belong in this picture? In my opinion, I think it's the books! Regardless, on Monday I received a present from my family back in F'burg!!! Yippee! Much happier than paper writing!

What was in the box? Well, I'll tell you!

A cute card that sings "Chocolate, Chocolate, Chocolate!" Insisting that I don't have to share my chocolate on my birthday. But... I do love my Bran-man, so I shared with him... but not the dogs.

I also received this beautiful blue Vera Bradley Purse! I love it. It is the perfect size to carry... everything! lol. It has a magnetic closure, which is SO nice, and it's reversible!

Inside the bag was this matching wallet, with instructions to take the contents and "pamper myself." I'm not sure what that will be, but I am definitely going to do it!

There was also this set of slippers! No more cold toes! They came in a little bag, which I am now using to store my flat iron and curling iron. :)

I was a pretty happy camper, and I've been carrying the bag ever since! So sitting down to write that paper on Monday was kind of a depressing time. I finished class at 7:45 and was home a little after 8:00pm. I had a long night in front of me. We decided to order pizza.

Best pizza ever... BBQ sauce, chicken, and pineapple. Yumm...

I finished the paper at 5:00 am and went to bed. I woke up around 8:00 am so submit my paper, and go to class. My brain was feeling kind of mushy... so I laid down for a few minutes before dashing to my bowling final!

Then, after a SUPER long day of classes on Tuesday, I arrived home a little bit after 8:00pm again, and there was my sweet husband. He had cleaned up the house, and was making dinner.

Scalloped potatoes and ham. One of my favorite foods. We watched food network, which may seem weird, but it's one of my favorite things to do while eating. Plus, I had not watched TV in over a week. Just been too busy! Brandan also made cake... but he cut it up and served it before I had a chance to take a picture. He forgot to put the candles on it, which... is a tiny bit sad, since I love blowing out candles, but probably for the better because we didn't burn the house down! What came next? Presents!!!

He wrapped them so purty! But that did not last for too long!

First I open this bottle of aromatherapy bath salts. He called it "a bottle of sleep"... since I obviously don't get enough! Lol, it made me laugh, but I am looking forward to using it sometime in the near future!

Then I opened this! B-man can be so cute sometimes, and I love listening to him explain why he picks certain things. A few weeks ago we went to a Bath & Body Works to buy hand soap, but I tried on this scent when we were there, and I loved it. It smells... awesome! So he bought me some. He spoils me.

Then I opened these! Yup, I got I got TWO pairs of slippers for my birthday... that's because my feet are extra cold (and I complain a lot)! These are from L.L. Bean, and sadly, they were a little small. We're going to return them. But, B-man told me "You have a ton of shows, so it's okay to have more than one pair of slippers." True-that!

The last thing he got me was something I had mentioned wanting before. It's for our emergency kit!

It got really good reviews, and it extra useful. It is a radio...

A flash light...

Has a USB port to charge a cell phone...

It runs on batteries, crank power, or solar power. I'm really glad we have this, and I have decided to store it in the window seal... so that is can solar-charge while we're not using it, but we know where it is if we need it.

I'll stop the picture spam now.

On Tuesday Brandan and I were having a conversation. It was kind of about poop. He said he loves everything about me, I asked if that included my poop and he said:

"If the only thing left of you were your

poop, I don't think I'd keep it."

Which.... so be honest sums up my feelings about his poop as well. I'm glad we're on the same page with this. I hope you laughed at that. He cracks me up all the time.

To sum everything up, it's been a fantastic birthday, and it's weird being 22... for some reason this birthday really does feel older than any other birthday I have experienced. If I look at the things I've accomplished in the last year (and the things I will accomplish in the near future), I really have grown up a lot. I'm married, dog-mommy, almost graduate college student who can write a ten page paper! Now, if that's not grown up... I don't know what is!

(ummm... I'm just kidding. There is still more growing to do... but I'm getting there!)

When it rains it pours!

So, this is... ironic. Generally "when it rains it pours" I think of bad things, but at this particular moment, I'm thinking about all of the people who have helped me over the last few days. Aside from the guy hitting my car and that whole day, yesterday and today have been wonderful (in most regards) as well.

Yesterday I was packing up all of my stuff, and I had just started considering moving it to my car when the thunder rolled and the thought of lugging super heavy boxes from my car to K's basement was very un-appealing to me. I packed some more, and then realized it wasn't raining all that hard yet. I still wasn't excited about carrying some very heavy boxes (I know... who puts all of their dishes in ONE box... not smart people, that's for sure), and so I called around to see if any one could make a few trips with me to help me move my stuff. After two "no answers" I finally called a friend who lives way out in West Knoxville. He's rather reliable, so I knew he would answer his phone. I was kind of hoping he was home, so I wouldn't feel so bad about not wanting to move my stuff in the rain - but he was actually just across the street. I was pretty happy at this point, even in the rain - help is better than no help. But then he did me one better! He was like "there's a bunch of people here with cars, I'll ask them to come too!" And five minutes later I had three cars and three guys there to help me. 

I felt like crying.

Then today, I went and picked up the part for my car, and took it over to Bill and Jen's. I know Bill is pretty handy with automobiles, and I had asked him to help me. There was a bit more damage to my car than I had originally known, but Bill was able to fix it any way, with the help of a hammer and a zip tie. I know it's silly - but I am so greatful for both Bill and Jen! Bill has helped me so many times, and Jen has too. I know that I can rely on them, and trust them - and at a time when I feel uncomfortably alone and stressed, just knowing I have some good friends is very comforting.

Ok - enough mush.  <3

Rubbing my eyes to sleep...

So, I had a wonderful amazing day - and I was really excited to come and blog about it. But then I ate dinner, and told a bunch of people, and sat down, and played on facebook... and I'm a bit less motivated. Regardless - I feel like sharing. I'm going to number the "Happy Events" of the day, to make it easier to follow:

1. I finished my last exam this morning - and I am done for the semester!
2. My WEDDING DRESS IS HERE! Here being my parents' home - but that will be where I reside in just four days.
3. I packed up a good deal of all my stuff.
   
   Now the good stuff!
   
   
4. When I went to put the "good deal" of all my stuff in my car, my front blinker has been... shattered. The pieces where all over the ground. I wasn't too upset - it's the same side that got dented in April of last year. Figured it would cost $50 for the piece, and it look easy to repair... BUT:
   
   as I'm standing there I notice a guy standing by his car on his cell phone. I turned to him, to ask if he saw who hit my car and he was like "I hit it. I thought I was going to have to wait forever for you to come out here! Just let me know if you want me to pay for it, or if you want to go through insurance."
   
   What? He had been waiting on me for 30 minutes! Any who, I know that getting a ding on your insurence as a 20 y/o male is probably the last thing you want, and I was fine with having him just pay me for the parts. So he gave me his name, number, and insurence information - just in case.
5. I was ironically on my way to the store to buy more tape to close up my boxes, so I didn't have any tape to secure what was left of my blinker. I collected the pieces, borrowed some masking tape from the front desk, and then headed off to Kelsey's to drop of my stuff, since:
6. Kelsey is letting me store my stuff in her basement for free over the summer - and subsequently she is saving me a couple hundred bucks!
7. I got to Kelsey's, and awkwardly backed into her drive way. We each carried one box tot he basement, but these were not light boxes. I mean - I'm trying to pack efficiently, so as to not take up too much space in her basement. So these were "MAN" boxes. When we went out to the car, who should randomly be walking in front of her house, but a set of Elders! Yes. I know. How perfect? So the Elders came and helped us carry the rest of my MAN boxes down to the basement. I was so greatful at that moment. I don't get mushy too often, but after we finished and I was driving away - it felt like a hug from heaven. I knew at that moment that Heavenly Father was watching out for me - even the little things.
8. I went to Krogers and bought some tape. I then proceeded to put together the pieces of the broken plastic light covering. I was only missing a tiny piece on the bottom corner, but other than that - I taped it back on and the light looks fine, the bulb is protected, and it should hold for a while.
9. Leaving Kroger I decided to stop by an auto parts store. I had already gone to one, and they had told me they couldn't get me the piece I needed, but I was just crossing my fingers, figured since I was out that way I should try any ways, and low and behold! The guy ordered it, and it will be here on Saturday!
10. I called the guy who hit my car, and told him the price, and we were going to meet up - but I guess he was headed out of town when he hit me, and he won't be back until after I leave. So he's going to mail me a check - with the back up that... I still have his insurence info.
11. Got back to campus, parked my car, got and and started walking when to random guys walked up to me...
    
    "Did your car get hit earlier today?"
    "Umm...yes...?"
    "We saw the guy, and waited around to make sure he left a note or something so... did everything work out?"
    
    
12. Then I got to tell them that he waited for me to show up, and that everything is going to be a-okay!
    

So. Not only did I pass all of my classes with flying colors, but the guy who hit my car waited around to tell me, it's an easy fix, the missionaries had perfect time, I got some delicious KFC, I taped my car back together, and there were other people looking out for me! 

I'm definitely feeling the love. So... how was your day?

Zippidee-doo-daa, Zippidee-ay!

My oh, my - what a wonderful day!

So today Brandan got a letter in the mail. An official offer for the job! Yes. The dream job. I don't know if I've blogged about this before or not. 

A few months ago Brandan was e-mailing with the boss-man, from the summer internships he's worked up in DC for a government agency. He was e-mailing his boss to say he would not be able to take a full time position with them because he was going to be living in Knoxville TN (so I can finish school) and the boss-man said "Oh, well I still want you to work from me, so I'll hire you as a contractor and you can work from home."

Um. Yes. That really happened. Wowzers!!! lol. So in anycase. They had been hammering out details and even though Brandan felt like the job was the real deal, and it was happening and we were stable and didn't need to worry... I was worrying. What if things didn't work out. There was no back-up plan. That was it. Our only hope. So when he got the letter in the mail with the official job offer, and an actual $alary number, and information on health insurance and dental insurence and retirement plans and company investing and so and so forth!!! Yeah!!!

I guess he is still trying to bargain for a bit more $$$, but as of right now - life couldn't get better. My life became real when I got the ring, when I filled out the marriage application, when we started buying things together - for us, when I was looking at apartments, and imagingi our life together. But now - it is real. We're not poor starving college students any more. We've got a salary (!!!) and we're working on a budget and golly-jeepers it's exciting and scary and crazy all at the same time!!!

Plenty of sunshine coming my way, zippidee-doo-daa, zippidee-ay!

I won't grow up... I don't wanna go to school...

I feel like I'm being forced to grow up, and it is too much for me. some days i just want to crawl back in bed and hide from the sun, pretend like it never came out, and that it is night. Today I found out that a dear friend of mine tested positive for HIV. I never dreamed that some one so close to me could be affected by this, and it makes me worry that more of my friends are in the same boat, but not willing to talk about it. Along with that, I also found at that a friend from my graduating class has cancer and is going through chemo.

These people are both the same age as me, and they are being faced with the sudden reality that we are not as invincible as previously believed. No one should have to deal with this at 18. Or 19 or 20 or ever. Why do horrible things like this exist.